The words, when I first heard them, were both terrifying and exciting all at the same time. What words you ask? The words “Congratulations! You’re expecting twins!”. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can prepare you for that. How do you prepare an expecting mother for that kind of news? Besides the fact that I had been having just a little bit of trouble during my pregnancy which is what led us into the emergency room that night, everything had been perfect. No sickness whatsoever. No weird cravings. No aches or pains. Nothing! I should have been more suspicious, I suppose, when the technician that was doing my emergency ultrasound nonchalantly asked me “does twins run in your family?”
Jessica(BABY A) and Rebecca(BABY B) were born 6 weeks early. I had gone in, for what the doctors thought, were kidney stones. When they decided things were o.k. and there were no kidney stones they sent me home. That evening my water broke. I ended up in the same room, same bed and had two beautiful baby girls at 10:18p.m. and 10:20 p.m. by C-Section. Both babies were breach. Fortunately, that WAS something I knew was going to happen. I was not able to hold the girls for a few days as they were life flighted to a Children’s Hospital due to their size. Jessica was 5lbs 6oz. Rebecca was a tiny 3lbs 5oz. Not getting to hold your newborn babies for three days….that will remain on the top of my list as one of the hardest things in the world.
Night and day. That was and still is my number one answer when people ask me if they are identical. Nope! They are night and day. While one would be sleeping soundly in her car seat the other would be screaming at the top of her lungs. While one was always content the other never was. One would sit there while the other would “inchworm” laps around her. One was a picky eater, one was not. Then as they got older….one cared about clothes, the other cared about hair. One can’t stand tomatoes and olives, the other loves both. They do not look alike and never really have. Although people would always tell me they couldn’t tell them apart, I really think it was just a matter of not “remembering” which one was which. To me they just look like sisters that happen to be born on the same day.
The girls have never really possessed that “twin” thing. They have never had their own language and no secret handshakes or anything. Now, don’t get me wrong. These two have done a few things that have made us go “whoa, that was weird”. For instance, a few years ago. I had one of the girls with me and we were headed to town. Michael had the other girl with him. Just driving along, Rebecca says to me “Mom, I just heard Jessie say the word ‘Mom’ “. I asked her what she meant and she repeated what she had just said. Well folks, let me tell you. I was instantly intrigued. So I called up my husband and asked him what he and Jessie were doing. He said that his brother had just got there and asked where Becka and I were. Jessie replied “Becka is with MOM”. I about dropped the phone, no lie! Goosebumps ran up my arms and I then explained to him what Becka had just told me. We’ve had a few experiences like that. As babies and toddlers I dressed them alike. Of course, as they got older, that was definitely NOT cool! They each have their own bathrooms. One upstairs and one downstairs. They don’t even see each other until it’s time to run out the door to catch the bus. However, there have been a couple of days when they meet each other at the door and they have on the exact outfit AND exact hairstyle. They just look at each other and say “you’ve got to be kidding me”. And out the door they go.
You always read that twins can’t stand to be away from each other. I will say that is true with these two girls. They can fight like cats and dogs but when one goes somewhere without the other they can’t stand not knowing what the other is doing. The one that stays home will ask me “where is…..” and “when will she be home?” And as for having each other’s back…..ALWAYS! They have been through some very rough times and some pretty great times together. They fight and bicker. They steal each other’s clothes. They even pretend to hate each other at times. But trust me when I tell you….don’t mess with either of them or you’ll have an angry twin to contend with. They are, in fact, each others best friend.
Twins are pretty amazing. As they get older they are becoming their own, individual, beautiful person. Not that they haven’t always been but as toddlers they were always classified as “twins”. People would say “you’re the twins mom”. Now I have become “Jessie and Becka’s mom”. They tell me they which colleges whey want to go to and they aren’t the same! What? You’re NOT going to the same college? They look at me weird…..until the tears come to my eyes. Then they say “Ok mom!!! O.k. We’ll go to the same college just please don’t cry” Although I know they are just humoring me…..I’m not sure how I will deal with the day they actually DO go their separate ways. That thought can be put on the back burner for 3 1/2 years.
As I mentioned in a FB post recently, after my daughter’s softball team lost a difficult game, her sister was the first one to hug her and let her cry. My caption for that picture was “Through the good times and the tough, these two are each other’s biggest fans. It’s not a twin thing….it’s a sister thing”